Darkness, strangers and new places have frightened me since I was little and I still tend to be anxious in public. However, after seeing the 2007 NTDTV Chinese New Year Spectacular in Boston on Feb. 10, I was moved to tears.
When I walked out of the theater, I wanted to call out to the reporters who were interviewing people outside the theater, "I want to be interviewed!" I felt as though I had become a different person, full of confidence, courage and hope.
When I returned home, I kept thinking of the various scenes in the show: the green wreath and quill pens in "The Vows of Old"; the innocent young woman, who, after being beaten to death by wicked Chinese police, ascended to a golden palace in the divine realm in "To the Rightful Place"; the radiant blue costumes of the young ladies in the Manchu court; those snow white long sleeves and the rainbow skirts of the Tibetan maidens; and the contrasting purple and pink of "Resounding Drums" and the magnificent "A Dunhuang Dream."
Never have I seen such a vivid and harmonious combination of colors. Never have I heard such profound and meaningful music. I felt so comfortable as I watched this show, but words can't express the beauty I witnessed!
Although I wasn't granted my wish to be interviewed by TV reporters outside the theater, I had an even greater wish to go to New York and watch the Chinese New Year Spectacular again! So I invited a few friends to join me. I didn't expect that the audience at Radio City Music Hall would respond even more warmly to the Spectacular, but they showered the performers with long applause. Meanwhile, I couldn't understand why I felt like crying when I watched this show.
Let me share a few thoughts from the bottom of my heart:
Twenty years ago my mom left me with her diary, in which she wrote, "My child was born during the unprecedented Great Cultural Revolution. I hope that she will be loyal to Mao Zedong's ideology forever, devote her life to the revolution, help build a Socialist society, march forward towards communism and contribute all of her strength in the class struggle!" In that diary, my mother recorded my growth since I was born until I reached 18. The first sentence I learned to say was "Long live Chairman Mao!" The first song I learned to sing was "The East Is Red." The first poem I learned to recite was the seven-character verse "Long March." The first sentence I learned to write was "Long live the Chinese Communist Party."
The Chinese Communist Party's politically motivated education began the moment a person was born and continued until one had become a creature deeply devoted to furthering the communist agenda and forever in fear of the Chinese Communist Party. As a result of such education, the Chinese people can readily recite the Party doctrine of "servicing the people." These people have become atheists that will sell their souls and conscience at any time. As a result of such education, I was taught not to believe in the principle of karmic retribution and not to mention Buddha, Tao or any deity.
During my 30 years in China, I did not know what it meant to watch a show. I wasn't taught to dress properly for formal occasions like this. I dress like a bum because I came from a destitute family and because there are no true art performances in China. (Even rich Chinese people only have access to Western music and dance in their country because traditional Chinese art has long been destroyed.)
The Chinese people have been brainwashed. Their mentality, facial expressions and how they carry themselves are a manifestation of the Party's warped notions of hate and belligerence. How can people possessed with these warped values possibly create or perform anything of value? For so long art has only been concerned with praising the Chinese Communist Party.
My grandfather was banished to the countryside during the Cultural Revolution. He sang a line from a classic Beijing Opera "Love and Loyalty" (also known as "Fourth Son Visits His Mother") when he was homesick [1] . As a result, he was paraded on the streets with an insulting sign around his neck and was beat up. They accused him of lacking the determination for the revolution and of being a counter-revolutionary because of his homesickness. My grandfather was not even allowed to miss his family!
My brother-in-law's rectal cancer was cured after he started to practice Falun Gong, but for his practice he was incarcerated for six months in 1999. He was subjected to many kinds of torture in prison and was not released until he swore to give up Falun Gong. For half a century, the Chinese people were blocked access to the outside world. It was all too cruel to live without freedom behind the Iron Curtain. As the years of oppression wore on, the Chinese people even began looking forward to the CCTV's dreadful Spring Festival Show.
I had the opportunity to watch a live performance of NTDTV's Global Chinese New Year Spectacular in North America and to enjoy genuine traditional Chinese culture; a divine culture free of the Chinese Communist Party influence. I am a truly blessed person!
I would like to take this opportunity to extend my heartfelt gratitude to NTDTV for giving me the pleasure of this performance and the feeling of returning home!
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